you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
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