You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
