Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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