Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
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