So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
