He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Randomize
