quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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