the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Randomize
