he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize
