They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
