I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
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