yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
