my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
