Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
