you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
me + whiskey = a bad person
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
