How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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