Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Randomize