I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
