honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
