that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Randomize
