if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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