I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I'm too high and old for this...
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Randomize
