Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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