i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
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