i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
