I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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