real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
