i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Randomize
