Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Randomize
