it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
