I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Randomize
