yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
