This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
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