Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
