Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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