New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
