whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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