So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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