I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
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