Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
how does that bad decision feel?
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
