I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
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