All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
