I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
