i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Randomize
