Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Randomize
