are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
