so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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