I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
