No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Randomize
