I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
