her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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